A look laden with innuendos like
Posted: Sat Apr 05, 2025 5:57 am
" Are you finished? You have to vacate the table. What, the other tables are all free? That's the rule. "
“ Hey, it’s me, Imoen! ” (yes, there are leftover staples)
" Unusual spice? No, we're in France. One coffee? Two? Come on. "
“ Ask the tourist office. ”
" Can I cash you? " (Be careful how you answer this question: answering " Obviously, no " doesn't make them laugh, it's very disappointing)
"Pfff..."
“PFFFFF…”
“PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFHALALALAAAARARHEUMRHEUM!” “
" All right, Michel, they're leaving. I think they understood my subtle message. "
On the other hand, there are therefore many variations on anything non-verbal: " Get out telegram data of here , " " I want a tip , " or " I'm going to devour your soul ," going back and forth near your table implying that it should free itself, or even wiping everything around you while making throaty noises—the thief stops at nothing.
Territory
The territory of the Parisian waiter is generally limited, as his name suggests, to a single Parisian café (although members of their race have been known to emigrate to ruin other tourist spots), from the dining room to the terrace without exception. As mentioned above, the Parisian waiter likes to wipe things: but in reality, you should know that his magic cloth is a part of himself, and that he can therefore send pheromones there that he then spreads quite widely on everything he touches. In this way, he warns that it is not good to stay in his territory, and prevents another member of his race from trying to steal his den. Which is good, since previously, he did the same with his urine. Note that some establishments have not really changed this practice, which largely explains the unique flavor of their cocktails, but let's move on.
If he doesn't mark his territory, it's not uncommon for another Parisian waiter to sit down and start ripping off tourists instead, which is quite annoying. A ritual fight usually ensues, during which the two valiant fighters face off, throwing their change at each other or whipping each other with their respective aprons until one of them falls and his body is transformed into rillettes to be served to the next Teutonic family who asks for some.
“ Hey, it’s me, Imoen! ” (yes, there are leftover staples)
" Unusual spice? No, we're in France. One coffee? Two? Come on. "
“ Ask the tourist office. ”
" Can I cash you? " (Be careful how you answer this question: answering " Obviously, no " doesn't make them laugh, it's very disappointing)
"Pfff..."
“PFFFFF…”
“PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFHALALALAAAARARHEUMRHEUM!” “
" All right, Michel, they're leaving. I think they understood my subtle message. "
On the other hand, there are therefore many variations on anything non-verbal: " Get out telegram data of here , " " I want a tip , " or " I'm going to devour your soul ," going back and forth near your table implying that it should free itself, or even wiping everything around you while making throaty noises—the thief stops at nothing.
Territory
The territory of the Parisian waiter is generally limited, as his name suggests, to a single Parisian café (although members of their race have been known to emigrate to ruin other tourist spots), from the dining room to the terrace without exception. As mentioned above, the Parisian waiter likes to wipe things: but in reality, you should know that his magic cloth is a part of himself, and that he can therefore send pheromones there that he then spreads quite widely on everything he touches. In this way, he warns that it is not good to stay in his territory, and prevents another member of his race from trying to steal his den. Which is good, since previously, he did the same with his urine. Note that some establishments have not really changed this practice, which largely explains the unique flavor of their cocktails, but let's move on.
If he doesn't mark his territory, it's not uncommon for another Parisian waiter to sit down and start ripping off tourists instead, which is quite annoying. A ritual fight usually ensues, during which the two valiant fighters face off, throwing their change at each other or whipping each other with their respective aprons until one of them falls and his body is transformed into rillettes to be served to the next Teutonic family who asks for some.